Of Course, It Will Only Be Used Against America

...or against killer rabbits.

The irony, of course, is rich:

The Navy will commission its newest nuclear-powered attack submarine Jimmy Carter on Saturday, Feb. 19, during an 11 a.m. EST ceremony at Naval Submarine Base New London, Groton, Conn.

The attack submarine Jimmy Carter honors the 39th president of the United States.

President Carter is the only U.S. president to have qualified in submarines. He has distinguished himself by a lifetime of public service, and has long ties to the Navy and the submarine force. Carter graduated from the U.S. Naval Academy in 1946, served as a commissioned officer aboard submarines, and served as commander-in-chief from 1977 to 1981. Carter's statesmanship, philanthropy and sense of humanity earned him the Nobel Peace Prize in 2002.

Retired Adm. Stansfield Turner, a classmate of the president who served in the Carter administration as the director of the Central Intelligence Agency, will deliver the ceremony's principal address. Rosalynn Carter is the sponsor for the ship named for her husband, with daughter Amy serving as matron of honor. In a time-honored Navy tradition, Rosalynn Carter will give the first order to "man our ship and bring her to life!"

It is fitting that the man who gutted the military will be honored by the man who gutted the CIA.

Keep a close eye on the poor sailors who form the mandatory crowd at this event if you want to learn the difference between a grimace and a smile.